May 3, 2017

Wednesday - Sunny and gorgeous

A very bad, horrible, no-good day.

I woke up early this morning, found that F hadn’t turned off the light last night.  I turned it off, made a trip to the washroom and went back to sleep.  I got up again later.  F and K had gone to an onsen, so I got up and tried to set up the wireless system in the house properly.  I didn’t manage.  Sigh.  

I came back upstairs and started looking up hotels for the two of us, in case he wanted to go somewhere this week.  All of a sudden I lost my internet connection. I am not really sure what happened, just that I was disconnected.  F came back around that time and instead of being helpful, wanted a hug.  I yelled at him not to touch me and off he went.  

I waited for him to come back, but he didn’t.  I heard his mother downstairs and I didn’t want a run-in with her.  I waited as long as I could and then made a break for it.  I did meet her as I was leaving and said hello.  

I walked to the apartment in the full sun.  I was not a happy camper.  I had left one of my sunhats in the car so this kind of thing wouldn’t happen, and of course it did happen.

I didn’t mind walking to the apartment, it was a nice day, but the sun was strong and I was hungry and thirsty.  When I got to the apartment I had some water and then saw about breakfast.  I finished up my yogurt and had some cereal with it.  

I watched some of my TV on the DVR and enjoyed it.  After a while, I decided to do something, so I starting taking the stove apart and cleaned that.  It took a while as it hadn’t been done for a while.  

Around 5 I started getting nice texts from F.  He said that he and his mother were going to Costco tomorrow, would I like to come?  I said I thought it would be crazy there.  I was also a little upset because why was his mother going to go?  I thought it might be fun for the two of us to do something together….

I took a shower and a bit later F showed up at the apartment.  He seemed happy to see me, although he sat in my spot on the couch and turned on the TV.  He asked if I wanted to have dinner and I did of course, not having had a proper meal all day.  I chose to go to Cocos as they have fairly decent chicken dishes.  

We went there and ordered.  It was a little loud in the restaurant, but not terrible in my opinion.  I asked him about him and his mother going to Costco the next day.  He said he thought it would be fun for all of us to go and I told him I wasn’t going to go.  He went ballistic and left the restaurant.  I phoned him and asked him to come back to eat.  

I was sitting at the table wondering if I should cancel his food, when he came back.  He was in a terrible mood and didn’t hear anything I said to him for the rest of the night.  If he finally understood what I said he acted like it was a pain to answer me.  

He drove us back to the house after dinner. I had thought about staying at the apartment by myself tonight because he was just so unpleasant.  We talked about going to Costco in the morning, he had told me he would tell his mother she couldn’t go.  That didn’t really seem fair, especially if she was looking forward to going.  He also talked about leaving at 5 or 6 am to get there, to beat the traffic.  I told him he could go by himself.  I also pointed out that he’d run off and left me twice today.  If he did that in Yamagata, I would be really stranded.  Lots of angry words followed that.

The tension in this room is really high at the moment.  He’s in pain and that is never a good thing, especially when he’s angry with me. Which came first, the pain or the anger?  I never know.  The latest thing is that I am too slow.  Too slow for what?  

I have gone to that blooming apartment every day since we have moved back to his mother’s.  I have cleaned and boxed and asked him to call the movers and he has done nothing.  I can’t even speak about the nights when I have a pile of boxes to take away and he just walks right past them and says he is too tired/in too much pain to do it. He won’t even go through his own stuff.  We were supposed to be out before April.  It’s May and we are still there.  I’m not the one dragging their feet.

I have no idea what, if anything will happen tomorrow.  I am really not in the mood to go shopping.  If I was cooking regularly at the moment, or if it was my own kitchen then I would enjoy a trip to Costco, but for me to go and buy stuff and not know when and if they’d get eaten seems like a fool’s errand.  I think I should stay on and do some more cleaning at the apartment.

That’s it for me.  Don’t worry too much if you don’t hear from me tomorrow.  I may have done a bunk to somewhere nice for a night, or I may be enjoying myself somewhere without a computer.  Come back later and see what I get up to.  Until tomorrow…?

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